Rattled

You rattle in my soul
like leaves in the wind.
You ring like a bell
in the center of my being.

You disturb me,
and yet You Are Peace.
Deeper Peace 
than I have ever known 
within myself;
for I have no self 
to call my own.

I am not. 

I have no life without You.
Your Presence possesses me
from the inside, out.
You hold the invisible spark of my life
in Your Gentle Hands, so tenderly
that I feel You are mine alone,
even while knowing You belong to All
in belonging to None; 
but that All Belonging is in You,
and without You, Nothing Is.

You disturb me,
and I awaken.
You rattle me
toward the Home 
You have prepared for me.
How could I stay where I am
with all this Love rollicking?!
Love that made the earth shake!
Love that rolled the stone away! 
Love that disturbs 
to make way for Stillness 
so sweet, breath cannot bear it;
and flesh must be glorified,
or faint from the fragrance 
of what has been named Heaven.

Such is the Wonder of 
Beholding Your Face
and being healed 
in the Gaze of Love
beyond all mortal imagining~
And so Your approach 
disturbs me, trembles me.
Not due to magnitude or force,
but because of Your Gentleness,
which is utterly exquisite;
Your Humility,
which is the Beauty
of the Cross;
Your Absolute Surrender
to the Love that is Your Substance;
from Which flows All Life and Light.

Your Most Delicate Touch
upon my soul is melting away
all that is false in me.
Look how undone I am,
with my whole heart 
cradled in Your Beautiful Hands...
Hold me forever, I beg You; 
that I may never again stray.
As You never leave or forsake me;
from this day, may I never leave
or forsake You, but always stay
with You and love You with all
that I am, and all that I have;
though both are nothing,
and You Are All~
my Life,
my Light,
my Love.

~cheryl anne 
a rattling, rambling, autumn journal entry from a few years back